Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
