called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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