i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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