you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
