I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
