My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
