Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Randomize
