Dual....:-)
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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