all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
