we're chasing vodka with high fives
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize