Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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