Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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