I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
