Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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