dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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