She said her name was "party"
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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