Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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