Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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