Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
