she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I can't turn off my feet"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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