hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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