She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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