mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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