I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
How external is "for external use only"?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Come share oat with me in your robe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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