Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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