You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
