Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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