the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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