At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize