In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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