We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
