People with herpes should wear stickers.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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