So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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