absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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