I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
