hotel room ftw
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize