his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
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P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
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