How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
