i was rollin on her like bob the builder
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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