I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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