So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize