i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize