Me. At least after what I've been through.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
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The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
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You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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