Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I wish I could teleport
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
