There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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