it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
