So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Randomize
