So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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