Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
