We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
